Stephen Martin

Squad No. 27
Birthday January 1, 1982
Age 35
Joined January 29, 2015
Experience 2 years
Previous Clubs None
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JUFC squad? State Ressies

Nickname? The current crop consists of Charlie, Cheeseburger and the Human Pear

Best player you have played with?

We’ve had some talent come through the doors over the last few season but for me Gaz Andrews and Jonesy are up there.

Best player you have played against? Adam Buckley (Bucks), always get stuck marking the wiry little bugger and can’t get anywhere near him.

Worst dancer at the club?

After the 80s do the other night there were a few contenders but nothing will take the title away from Brucey, hopping around mad on the dance floor doing tuck jumps took the cake.  I won’t even discuss the worm!!

Worst dressed at the club? Mike Kenny, but he thinks he looks great.

Funniest bloke at the club? None other than MC Rust.

Grumpiest bloke at the club?

When their powers combine they are unbeatable for whinging on the pitch or training, you know who you are Jordan and Fezza you whingy little baaaaastards.

Tightest bloke at the club?

I would say Steve Irvine but every time we ask him for payment of some sort we have to ask his wife, so I am not sure he even has any money to be tight with.

Loosest bloke at the club? Rudy Proctor, I don’t even know half the stuff this guy’s has done and he is still streaks ahead.

Most under thumb?

Most wouldn’t know the guy but Daz Darroch, some of the excuses he has given for not training or playing over the past few season have been horrendous.

Angriest man at the club? Has to be Dazza, his mood can change in an instant, generally after the neck of his first beer.

Best position? For us at JUFC it would definitely be first!

Greatest JUFC moment on or off the pitch?

When Mev Kerry junior sneakily sucked the tits of the fat Gero bloke while Sam and him were having a dance off last year.  Haven’t cried that much in a long time, having video evidence made the moment even more special.

Biggest game you have played in?

State league cup semi-final last season, as an amateur club taking on a two year undefeated state league premier side in Perth S.C.  We lost on penalties but gave them a scare.

Best ground you have played at? NIB Stadium.

Ambitions for the future? To help turn JUFC into a top state league, amateur and social side.